The scar may fade, but the fear stil lingers... and Thank you

I was driving to mall yesterday, for the 1st time driving during the night after the incident. Was goin out with Bob and Nissie with their fren Andy. we were watching Avatar. It was a good movie. I love the whole concept, whoever came up with that idea, s/he was briliantt. Every detail of the avatar...... anyway..After the movie we had a late dinner at McD and then we went to our separated ways.


I guess i have a new fear now. Traffic lights. Especially when it's green and no one is around. In my head, the green traffic light is just a trap for me to ran into... and that someone or something is just waiting to run me over when im through the traffic lights. Either they're waiting for me, or they are just driving so fast to pass the traffic lights just because he sees no one is there...

".. no one is round, im just gna drive through the red lights, who would know anyway.."

Last nite... Zainol's face lingers in my mind...all the way home..with the innocent look and his "im sorry~". Its like they hit me then they apologized. just as simple as that. Hit, apologize. Hit and apologize... and sent me to the hospital, stitched me and im good as new. WOW. well... at 1st i thought i could take as simple as that way. Stitched and im good as new. but i would never thought it would affect my driving. These fear... I kept on braking the car evertime i see a traffic light.. even thought it's green. and my heart is drumming and my eyes are wildly looking at every lane. Its just intense...and no.. i don't trust the mirrors much. I once did, i end up breaking one of them.

well... im just goin try to get over it. and that means facing this fear, again and again. plus, my Bro suggested i should claim my scars from Zainol. A scar for a scar... perhaps the left brow...J.K hehehe. My bro suggested that i go to Zainol's insurance company. But i need my Medical reports. Which i will do on monday...

Owh btw, When i was at the E.R. I was talking pics of myself not because im vain (altho 80% i am xp). But i was just covering myself from thinking of what's goin to happened. Its a distraction for me. But i was actually scare... Mostly on how to tell my parents abt it. and the fact that this scar will be on my face forever...and imagining the "what if"s... so im thankful for the people who came to the hospital that nite.. i needed more distractions. and thanks to Dayat for letting me stay at his place, so i have time to think on how to tell my parents.

so anyway, My stitches were undone last Wednesday and drank the nasty haruan. the scars are les visible now. even my dad doesnt notice it and i didnt have to really hide it.

But anyhowwww... I got a good news for meself.I got it last wednesday! I cant tell why though... but i could say this..

THANK YOU
Thank you to all Lecturers for helping me through the Exams, Assignments and Tests. Especially Sir Hj. Irwan, Ms. Wida and Ms Yeo. Thank you to my Friends who worked hard with me or for me, whom help me to pass. Thank you very muchh! and lastly.. thanx to my Parents and family...although you guys we're tuff on me about goin out late to study, i know u only do it coz u cared about my health. I guess my black eyes tells a lot of stories to a lot of people yehh. And dad... sorry i yealed at you. I know you mean well but sometimes they way you deliver it... just makes me go crazy. hihihi. And lastly, Thanx to Allah for everything.

Ayt.. that's for now

TTFN CHEERS!

The Accident and the Results

THE ACCIDENT

evrything went so fast. it still plays in my mind...over and over again...

This is how it goes..

I went out with Alan and the Chuas. We had dinner at Excapade and chilled at SnS.Then we hung out at the Chua's house. we had fun with my camera..

we really did had fun. we needed it. after all, we havent spent time 2gether for almost 6 months.

it was late, its time for us to go home, we said our good byes and be on our way. then the tragic happened..

( not a real picture, but i do remember the car was smokey when it got hit..)

it was at Tunku link traffic, near the Biro.. we were driving on the green light towards gadong ( Car A) where the car from Gadong (Car B) marched towards us on a red light (obviously... since we ijau masih)




Alan's car spin over 180 degrees and 1/2 of the engine and his tyre is destroyed. while the other car damaged a part of its engine and his tire and was off the lane.

The last thing that i could remember. It felt like riding on a bumper car... only its real and dangerous. after we were hit, all i could remember was.. the car got smokey and i couldnt see well.. i was on a double vision. i felt my forehead and i felt something wet. I looked at Alan and he was saved by the Airbag and he was fine. And so we got out of the car immediately...and walked off the car.

There were people stoping by watching us. some called the police and the ambulance. some people asked me

" ok ko? inda ko paning?"

for a moment there i couldnt see right. its like Mr. Ang punched me on my face x10. but i manage to shake it off and said no. then they asked me to sit down. but i didnt. i stood by Alan.

then Alan said to me

"dud, Ur dahi bedarah" (something like dat)

and i checked.. and yeap.. somewhere on my forehead.. it was bleeding and dripping. i asked for tissues and alan took it from his car and so i tried to stop the bleeding. then some guy asked me to sit down and alas, i did... (majal bahh)

So i sat in the mid of the road. The guy that hit us came to us and said he was sorry and lay his hand out for a shake... i couldnt say anything... i dunno if i forgave him or not... so i just shoke his hands. His face was familiar but i couldnt figured it out.. then he said

"ko org itb kan?"
and tadaaa... Org itb panya.. no wonder i recognized him. "awu.. ko org itb?"
he said yes.

he said his appologies again and again. still.. i dun remember if i said "its ok". I usually say its ok. the thing abt me is... if someone did something wrong and he said he's sorry, i usually accept their appology. In my head, he's already suffering by knowing that he's wrong. but in this case.. im not sure. Im freaking bleeding. and its on my face... im not sure i could forgave him yet.

Then came the ambulance. one of the guy asked me if i wanna go to the hospital, since the ambulance was there. i hesitated at 1st, coz i dun wanna leave Alan alone. i mean.. he must have been in real shock. So i asked Alan if he could take care of things there and he said he could. so i followed the ambulance back to the hospital.

while i was in the Ambulance van, my blood pressure was checked and they asked me...

" do u have high blood presure?"
I did remember before. when i went to the hospital and check with the doctor. i did had some high blood presure thing. but this time, i said " i dun thing so" or "im not sure". im not sure why i did dat..

so they checked it again and it was fine. phew...

I texted Kai if he could pick me up at the Hospital. but he didnt replied. (i forggot that he was in KL. yikess..) then i called Acun. Thank god He was still hanging out with Han and Nigga. and he agreed to pick me up.

i arrived at the ER.. round 1.50 ish. and i was sent to the check up 1st. then i was tranfered to wait at room 24's door. After a while, Acun came up. and asked wat happened and i told him the story. then came Nigga and Han.

Then the doctor called me and she started to check me. She asked me what's my injury, and i said "just several cuts on my forehead" and she said how come? and i said " car accident" and suddenly she was shocked...she checked my wounds 1st and explain to me what's the situation. there i know the wounds were on my brows. 3 cuts.

I blured the pic sal... its too brutal to look at. Ku pun inda brapa sanggiup meliat.

she started to ask me to do some stuffs. Lifting my legs, wigling my hips, etc etc. and on evry move i made, she said " ada sakit?" and i answerd No. she still has that " i dun belive this" face.
She asked me more questions whether if i have pain in other place but my brows. then i checkd and i found a small cut on my knee.

She kept on asking how i got the cuts. and i said.. i dunno.. or i dun remember. She said if i knocked my head on glass.. there must me some glassed in my wounds. but i said no. Alan's window was not broken. it was cracked.. but not shattered. and i dun remember hitting my head there.

Anyway.. after the check ups. she asked me to wait for the sewing doctor to come in. Acun texted Dayat and he came with Indra.

It was a longggg wait. Sampat g dayat and Acun antar indra ke Tamu selera and came back. while waiting, there was a guy, his thumb got bitten by a Kukang. A small monkey like animal that has golden fur. he said he didnt know it was dangerous.. it was small and look like pet-able. he ends up having a damaged thumb. His nail had to be removed. and i dunno the rest. i dun think i wanna know... considering im next!

This is wat Kukang looks like. I googled it. huihihih. it does look pretty innocent to me. never knew its a " i'll bite ur nail off!" kinda animal.

And so my doc came and called me and started to check my wound. he asked me to lie down and he covered my face with a piece of paper. I said to him

"make sure to say evrthing that ure doin"

then he started to clean my wounds. and started to inject me with a thing that make me brows numb... that was sooooooooooooo sakittt.seriousllly!! more painful than getting the wounds. (infact, i didnt feel pain when i got the wounds..) after that.. he started sewing my cuts. i bet i'd hurts hell much if i didnt get the shots. huhuhuhu.

after few minutes of struggling in pain while bein sew. He finally finished and cleaned me up. From the way he cleaned my face, i guess my blood was flowing all over my face...yikes..

anyway, once i was done. Alan came in to be checked up! i guess he was from the Police station. so while he's bain checked up.. me and dayat went to get my medicine, while acun and the others went home.

Then Alam pun siap kana check, then we all went home~ well except me... i couldnt dare to go home yet.. so i slept at Dayat's place.

the next day, i texted my mom that im sleeping over and then later that morning i called my mom and told her evything. She was shocked and cried abt it. baik jua ia inda pengsan.. alhamdulilah...

but i didnt tell my my dad yet...its just too scary... believe me...i lived with him for all my life. i just dun wanna start talkin abt him here. PANJANG CETA NYAAA.

anyway... so now... i kept on covering it with my hair, or used cap to hide it from someone i need to hidee.

THE RESULTS

it was out on Thursday, 10th. It was a crazy wait. Evryone was so nervous about it! including me! crazyyyy. but lastly... it came out!!

I gottt...

1 D; My SDP.THANK TO MY BEBEHS, SIR HJ IRWAN, BADLI and RUSHDY
Then the rest i got passed. Thanx to all lecturers and frens!
Except AIP... i have to resit this paper...

SHUCKKKSSS!

Owh well... i must try to study it againnn! i can do thiss!!

congrate to my frens yg passed dah!! gd luck to my frens yg resit! and to my frens yg fail... plz try againnnn... repeating aint that bad...

Thanx to all lecturers yg mengajar kmii. TQ TQ VELY MUCHH!

aytt... i gtg now

CHEERS!!!

Long monday

It was one of the longest and yet fulfilling day. I didnt even say no to any offers, eventho i was freaking tired. I guess because i just dun wanna go home yet, not while im not done and ready to rest. so this is how it goes...

Watching the New Moon.

finally, i've watched it! I watched it with Belle and Dayat. Well... Dayat kinda were watching with us, but in different cinema. whooops sorry yat.

It was at 10.15 am when i called Cineplex for the seatings, i called them last nite, but they said we need to pick em up asap, as in dat nite jua, for the monday morn show. so the next day (yesterday, monday) i called the cineplex and i still could book some seats! yayyy... so i booked for 3 and the dude from the cineplex asked me to pick it up at 11am. Yayy.. and i immediately text Day and Belle about it.

BUt unfortunately, we arrived later than 11am. i came round 11.10am. and guess wat? They canceled out my bookings. daym they're tight... but dun they usuall call us if we still want the tix or not? aint that why they need our contact number when they ask? hmmmm.. owh well. anyway..

I was the 1st to arrived and went to the counter and was shocked that our tix were canceled, so i talked with dude if we could have other seats. fortunately, there were... and it was better seats. hihihih. But i only took 2 tix coz day didnt replied my calls or texts, so i figure ia inda jadi.

Then came belle and in we go~

Time the movie starts, ada tia Day text, ia di mall dah... Yikesss... so i texted him to quickly get the tix coz there were seats beside us. tunggu punya tunggu... org lain plang yg dtg. then Day text me he'll cath it in another cinema in cineplex. hehehe

Sowie yattt~

Now... New moon. It was alrite... not worse as i expected coz banyak org cakp.. boring, too much talking yada yada. But it was alrite for me, but it is true when ppl say Twiling is better. MUCH better. but the wolves are coollll... the S.E was greatt... and i love Victoria. i have a thing wf hot red heads... huhuhuhu. Edward was sooo... Drama. Drama brabis. He has no life but for Bella. romantic but pathetic. Bella was kasian tho... 3 months in a chair and the cam was pusing2 on her. hahaha. but i feel her. Jacob... he's more funnn. Werewolves are funn!!! tapi oba sensitive. Tampar skali, kambang bulu, kuar gigi. But it was an alrite movie... I was expecting more, sal san2 ckp.. c bella jaid 1/2 vamp 1/2 werewolf, kali nya nada... Egggsss!

Nwayyy

TH!nk B!g Meeting at Icentre.

I only had few minutes to go from the cinema to icentre.. punya Zooom ku~ hahahah. Sampai sana. met J and M, then we pick a table and sit and wait for our turn....

dudududududu~

lapas dorang Tang punya group, we're next! So basically... They help us to understand on wat to put in the Business proposal, which we need to finish on 15th. Some of the lecturer suggested that we could let a business student join us to help us the business part. but im not sure yet.Hmmm.. to tell ya the truth. i feel like backing out sal im sooooo in the holiday mood now... but Ms W and some Lecterers and some ppl, some how encourage us to keep on goin...

we sometimes even motivated ourselves by imaging oursleves if we won the cash and the phones that we could buy...WAhh~ Nokia x3? Ijust want another musicXpress~ hehehe

but wat if our will fade? wat will happen to the business person... We cant left him or her hanging. Haiyyya... But wateve it is... i need to discuss this with my team mates. I already Email then via FB tho.

anyway, after the meeting, had a lil bite of chicken wings and chips and we're off.

Sushi Dinner!

Wahhh.. i had an hour to kill til Sushi time and guess wat i did??

We'll i texted them that we're having em in Excapde, but i didnt say where, but i assumed they would know in Gdg.. since nobody asked me "where?". But when i called Excapade Gdg, they said it was full, and at the moment she said "its full....."

My freakin phone went dead.

My Battery was already busted and if i charged it, i wouldnt be as fully charged as the indicator says. and worse, the battery will die when i made calls. so the problem is... how the heck am i gana tell them that Gadong is full and we need to change venue?? and so this is wat i did..

I went to Excapde gdg and pity force em to open the restaurant early and try to reserve a table, and as the said from the phone, it was full, soi asked them to call the Kiulap branch and they called for me~ hehehe. and so i reserved a table in Kiulap branch from Gadong branch~ now that's settled, next was how am i gna text em all when my phone is dead? This is wat i did...

I walked to the mall and buy me new batteries~ and thank god it was pre-chranged!! hehehe. I needed to buy a new anyone and this couldnt be the worse time to do so. and so i texted them all and changed the venue.

We had a nice and a bit "rushed" dinner. cians Lim. inda tantu rasa kan makan since kana rushed. the waitress said that we would be so kind if we finish off at 8pm. sighh~ owh well~ it was nice tho.

YAyasan~

After we dine, we convince Lyn and Az to go to Yayasan inseated of Qlap mall, Lim wanted to find a Nike-pro. its basically comfee tights for upperbody. its for his hockey thingy. huhuhuhu. Then we run tru every stuffs we could comment on in the store... even a frying pan. hahaha. Pastu, while the others balik, me and Lim went for a dim sum dine!!

We spent $10 for each of us (5 = $10, 10 = $20) it wass alrite.. i did tried something that i never tried b4... i forgot wat its called.. but it was yummeyyy.

Then we watch some ppl were recording a vdeo clip there. There were members of Abnadonce and Fakhrul with some other local artists. they're song was like

"all we need is love~"

It kinda sounds lame from a distant, but i dunno how it will be as a final product.

Watching 2012

Time ku kan antar c Lim to his car (excapade kiulap) we drove round he qlap mall to find acun and Han.. the're watching a movie there. but we couldnt find their car... but we have something else in our mind... 2012. hhuhuhu. it was playing in 1/2hour and why nottt~ so.. i send Lim to his car 1st and we both went to Qlap mall.

pastu bru tah kejumpaan dorang di Cinema nya... the're watching Ninja assassin. A veryyy Brutal movie. me like. i've watched it b4.

now... 2012

It was... an ok ok movie. a one hit movie. the one that i only watch once. heheh. but the s.e was great. the ships, the crazy go mental earthquakes, stunami, etc etc.. it was crazyyyyyy.

At the Arch

after watching the movie, we and Cun and Han and Nigga chilled there. Just talking, drinking and laughing... i couldnr even remember wat we talked about... hahahaha. maybe i wass too haiyoongg.

So anyway, that's my longgg mondayyy. didnt take any pics tho, if i could print out my mental pics, i would. hehehe

CHEERS~

Gayah's bday and TW frenly match

Last friday, There was a gathering held at Lambak, As's house... well... not anymore tho. It was their last day in that house and they were packing up. Anyhow, this gathering was actually Gai's Surprise bdayyy!

I came late and i did witness the surprise =(. but i did manage to see the cake! hehehe. Here are some of the pics.

Me on cake.Me taste guddddd


Gai, the bday girl.

The cakee... designed by Dj, created by Shay. Yummeiiii!!


The bday card. so the very nice!


IMDians yg hadir. hehehe. Some Cps and IS were there too. x) *stop being course-ist!!!!! hahahaha

It was a great moment and im surely gna miss the IMD ppl hangin out. I really do... sigh... owh well.. we cant really dwell on batah2. we need to move on anyway. SIgh... I'll miss membirah sama PL and Belle. I'll miss kacau2 the girls. I'll miss bein gay with the guys. i'll miss us all working together every class. i'll miss us all jln2. etc etc etc. uwaaaaaaaaaa

SLAP... get it 2ther zwan...

Anyway... TW futt match!


Well.. inda semua dtg.. infact.. only a few.. banyakkan kawan c Snorlax and Fish. wakil TW, Me, Fish, Facrey, Ijat, Awie, alan and Remy. I dun even know who won... hahaha.. ku tau gamabr saja. I wonder where are all the other tWs are.... hmmmm~

Anyway, pastu, i when to have a drink with Alan at Tymes di Kiulap (x-taurean) and we catched up with eachother. ehehehe.. lama dah inda catch up. we're goin out agen next week and he's pickin me up. hehhehe. Finally, its the other way round now. ehehhee.

Ayttt.. gtg and catch up some movies..TTFN

More pics?

Gai's Bday
TW match

CHEERS!

Charcoal and Bowling pics from Acun's cam

Expensive but yummeyyyy



"awayyy paparazziiii"



Iklan Nacho... Charcoal show hire Acun as the model.. huhuh


My food~








more pics here at Acun's FB.. if u can view it. heheh

Anywayy... XOXO~

The fat lady has sung and broke the glass... as well as the gossip. in every opera, there's always love flying in the air, or perhaps, as people mite say, a sick affair...an act of scandal ism between a student and a Mentor. Could this just an act of a desperate girl whom thirst of attentions that she created stories, or some tragic history had just repeated itself. naughty naughty, plz pull up your panty~

CHEERS

EXAMS' DONE!!

Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wahhhhhhh. We worked our ass off for the exams and we're finally done with it! Finallllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! hehehehe. IM SO GANA PAMPER myself and do stuffs that i wanna do! and i wanna get rid of my Panda eyes!!! and my weight... insyallahhhh... im goin to the gym soon. hehehe.


been counting days til the day it ends...



... now its time to lay back and relax.... =)

anywayyy.. Updatess!! so many dah tertangguh!! first.. My bdayyyyyy!!

This year's bday was greattt.. despite it lays days before exams but it was fun. hehehe.


this cake was from Dillah and Tinie. Dorang surprise me at my house... konon minta ajar PhP codingss~ hahahaha... Thanx dil and Tini! xp


Then mlm, i hung out wf the UVs and Acun. the UVs are celebrating the Novemberians, whom are, Sham, Marc, Wuen, Meow and Me. hehehe. 1st stop, we went bowlinggggggg!


I could never be good at this game. huhuhuhu. Anyway, it was fun to bowling wf em. mcm2 kerenah ada. hahaah.

aftr that, we went to Capers!

Thanx for the cake Uvs!! =) really really appreciate it!



I got a new Shuffler! its my 1st apple stuffs. heheheh. Thanx Don.

Next we went to Rizqun Hotel. Don and Ayai were staying there for the night and we just hung out there for a while.


This is the Rizqun pool.

Then the next day, I went to Silah's place to study for the Exams....


and then another surprise!!! hehehe.



Thanx Ya'll!!

Lapas atu... EXAM melandaaaa...

Where we all go a lil bit crazy...


having sleepless nights..


And the days seems soooo longg.

It was a cruel Process. But Thanx to all lectuers for helping us getting through it. Notes, Tutorials, Tips, Revisions... all of em helped us greatly. Thanx to all CIS lecturers!

And thank you to my frens yg dgni group study. Xp tq the very very of the much muchhh!

Anyway... after the exams.

SHAMITA'S SWEET 16!!




The party was great!!! the theme was Candyland.. thus our colorful outfits. hihihi. The party is just wat i needed after the Exams... well.. A part of wat i needed. And its was Surely a Candyland!! So many "candiesss" to look at... i mean... to eat... dudududud~ hehehe.

i really had fun that nite. =)

NEXTT

EXAM's Pre-Celebrations!! (Pre sal results alum out... hihih. celebrating the fact that we finished our exams)

Well.. in the morning, me and my bitches went to Andre Santiago's Salon at the mall, Dayat needed a haircut and we Needed to ask the prices for Highlights. hehehe. Pastu, We had lunch at Excapade Kiulap 2 with meen and Jau. Jau is our old fren back in MD.. i used to call her Lilo. ehehehe. But she's grown out of it already... she's fabulous nowww... grrr.. hehehe

anyway, after lunch.. we went off to places just killing time and lastly went to Acun's place to rest and get his camera.

then at 6, we dine at Charcoal! i never been there b4, it was my 1st time and yummmmeyyyyyyyy...

I ordered Salmon Cheese with Potato salad and fresh tossed salad. YUMMMEYYYY.. mahal max plang... but yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!! skali skala makan usin bah ahh~ ehhehe.

Pastu, we hit the bowling alley~ Utama bowling!




Halim was supposed to join us... ntah inda tau kenapa... ia inda reply text... di call inda jawab... sigh... i was expected to hang out with him jua...perhaps next time sja. he owes us.

but anyhow, we had a great nite. hehehe.

anyway... XOXO sikit ya...

A lil tiger has show its true Belang lah ah... We known this person as an Alim person and such a penyabar person. Someone who doesnt really care wat ppl said and who can take a joke. and i even Kasihan on this person evrytime when the jokes are on X (lets just say X is this person's name)... and i even freaking nice to X even tho x was the subject of a joke.But apparently... this person is not wat we think..

Evrytime the jokes is on x, ia seems fine with it... and even played along with it... so we assume x is ok with it and besides... its a joke... we dun really mean it. So anyway, our resources says that X has been saying bad stuffs abt us behind our backs bcoz of the jokes. Harsh words were used to describe us. X may perhaps says x hates us all. Yikes... so unexpected...

Two-Faced.

owh well... Now we know, we learned, and some showed thier emotions, some just dun even cared about it anymore. for me... I regreted for even having the pity on x... thinking that i could be the fren when x needed. so now... my mind has been altered, images has been tainted. Im sorry ya... aint gna see u the same way as before.

ANYWAYYY

U guys know Khaz Corner Di Rimba? There's this one lady waitress, she was freaking rudeeeee!!!!!! i dun really get her name... but we call her si jambul senget. cos her hair was pulled up senget. so anyway... this is the story..

Our fren found a giok...Eeeeeww... Major Eeeeweeee.... in her kolomee... after she finished eating it... eeewwweuue... euwueueuuew....


That's Mr Giok.

So anyway... we called c Senget and complaint abt it... and u know wat she said?
We said" there's a giok in the food"

she replied with a bitched up face..."kali?" as in English "so?"

SO??? SO???? WTH????!!! There's a freaking Giok in the food and she said.. SO??? Last time i check... Giok is not one of the main ingredient for Kolomee!! and she took it as if it is!!

She then took the dish and put it to the kitchen area and left us to the cashier.

WTH????!!!

So we all went to cashier and wanted to pay the food... except the Giok-ed Kolomee. and si senget was soooo bitchyyyy!! but after negotiating... she finally let us go. but just before i went off the door... i saw her mumbling her lips... and i immediatly shouted at her to smile and be nice. and followed up with a stare from my fren and she was... tunduk... Pandaiii iaaa takutttt.

But seriously.... she got some sick issues... apparently ia pernah kureng hajar to my other fren. rasa kan di Taing bahhhh.. Crazy bahhh.

Owh well..

More pics?

novemberians
My bday
Sham's party
Some pics are from Deviantart.com

Ayt... GTG... CHEERS!!!

Haircuttttttt!

I just had it done last nite at Alan Inspiration Saloon, Done by Emily!!! she's my current hairdresser. hehehhe. she's really good and very nice... she brings ya tea and biscutts. hehehe.

and she was saying " haiyaaa so sayang your hairrr.." wat to do mehhh~ i got a presentation on monday and i need to look presentable ( to the Bruneian custom). sighhh~ owh well.. my hair will grow backk.

Ayt...
CHEERS!